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Mark D.'s Daily Digressions is a separate page from the man mostly to blame for bringing you The Cabbage. It is not part of The Cabbage and in many ways is actually less entertaining. If you don't like what Mark says, that means you are able to form opinions, which is a good and noble thing. If you would like to reach Mark you can either email him at mark@thecabbage.com or ehlkemd@hotmail.com. Mark asks that, if you are another attractive single female sending him mildly suggestive photographs, you use The Cabbage address as his hotmail account storage is almost filled.
This page initially designed by Dan, but anything that looks bad is a result of Mark adding stuff.
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5/24/03 No, I have not completely abandoned those of you who seek digressional solace here in an ever-increasing undigressional world. I could sit here and tell you how extremely busy I was over the last fortnight, but, looking back on it, I really don't know what I did...of course, I had to pack and play disc golf and air out my only dress shirt I didn't pack in between graduation and call service in the window (how's that for syntax?), but apart from that, I'd have to admit that my mind was only too all-over-the-place to do anything constructive on here. Isn't that a philosophical gem?--I was so digressional in my thoughts that I was too digressional to digress on the daily digressions page. I think this proves that, on any level, composition always requires a minimum amount of focus. I finally got the bugs out of the Copper Rock website for those of you who have viewed it on anything other than the latest Internet Explorer versions. I had to switch over all of the character encoding to some other thing that I don't quite understand, but it seems to be working, and, being somewhat of an anti-process over product extremist (educationally speaking), I have to say "if it works, who cares how you got there?" As I mentioned on the homepage, I received a call to Mt. Lebanon in Milwaukee. I have to admit that at first I was rather indifferent (as bad as that sounds); I think what threw me off was the grade level...I have never taught at the 5th and 6th grade level, only high school and 7th and 8th grades. Geographical speaking, I was very happy since I'll be in the "big" city and fairly close to my parents and really close to three of my brothers who live in the area, in fact, I might even live with Kevin somewhere in between our respective schools. Content-wise, I shouldn't have too much of a problem. The self-imposed challenge is to take any creativity and intelligence I might have and use it to shape interesting and fun (Heaven forbid!) lessons and also to challenge them...to keep that carrot in front of them, not so close that they gnaw on it and trample upon it so much that, by the time they reach high school, they have lost all sense of educational zeal and excitement. I recognize that that last sentence tried to sound profound, but failed miserably. But the thought remains. In light of the fact that 4/7ths of the Ehlke clan will soon be in the Milwaukee area, apparently my future sister-in-law Kathie (or is it Cathie? or Ckathie? or Kathy? or...) made some crack about the Great Commission saying that we are to go and preach to all nations. Then my mom said that southeast Wisconsin is good enough for her sons or something like that...anyway, I thought that was kind of funny. The roadmap to peace...Sharon finally agreed to it. Again, I don't know as much as I should about this entire topic, but it seems like you got Sharon, who seems like a pompous Boris Yeltsin to me, and this Abbas (sp?) guy who doesn't seem to have the real support of his people. Then you got the French sticking their noses in saying that we should consult Arafat, who, technically has no power. Why go to some guy who has done nothing but support violence? I'm not very optimistic (about anything) or knowledgeable about this roadmap...I hope it works, but I think it'll end in (insert journalistic vehicular pun here). You've got your "Quartet" and 3 of the 4 are historically anti-Isreal...doesn't seem very fair to me, but I think, since Israel has the upper hand geographically, militarily, economically, and organizationally speaking, I almost believe that the cards need to be stacked against them for any real progress to be made. If Palestine doesn't save face over the whole process, this violence will never end, no matter who is in charge on any side. I'm done for now.
5/10/03 Eek, it's almost been a week since I ranted...although I really haven't truly ranted for quite some time now. I saw an interesting movie this evening--Identity. I would have to categorize it as a shallow thriller thinly veiled in psuedo-psychology. But what are you going to do? It was better than Armageddon. Today I had my last real final exam here at MLC; I have one group type project on Wednesday, but that's it. Today's exam was math...most of the problems seemed to add up okay, but there were 2 that I wasn't sure of. Grade school math can get pretty tough at times, I guess. The final issue of The Knight's Page came out today...inside you can find an op-ed piece written by yours truly. I won't air dirty MLC laundry in public by explaining the details, but it was something that had to be said in Christian love, but, unfortunately, it will probably upset a few people. Yet, thus far I have received more good comments about what I wrote than anything ever in The Cabbage, so it seems that a lot of people shared my thoughts on the subject, which is promising. All these tornadoes are just crazy. I really have to read up on the Middle East roadmap...I have been lazy in keeping up on that. In the past I have doubted the connection between Iraq and peace in the Middle East, but I'm starting to come around on that. I think that years from now all our current heavy involvement in foreign affairs may be viewed somewhat like the Reagan-era military spending: it sure cost a lot (money and other...), but we're still here. It's hard to know what's enough and what's too much when national security is at stake. As an independent libertarian who votes Republican, I tend to go along with a hands-off approach to just about anything that isn't necessary, but who am I to say that a stable Middle East isn't vital to national security? I just don't know. I spoke to another class over at Bethany on Tuesday...it was a lot of fun for me...a creative writing class. Not sure what that means...what is creative writing? I remember having a creative writing class in high school and in college, but I never really understood what that meant...there has to be a better word for it...I don't know. David Sylvian has a new album coming out soon...not sure when it's being released in the States. I should really redesign this whole site now that I know HTML. I still don't know how to do guestbooks yet, though.
5/04/03 The Copper Rock website is almost done. I basically redid the entire thing using much cleaner code and it seems to be working well on three different browsers that I tried. The Cabbage came out in color this week...very nice colors and on glossy, high-quality paper...not that it matters to you if you read it online, where it's in color every week. The end of the year has snuck up on me, leaving me trying to decide a few things: one more issue or two? what articles do I "have" to use? will it continue after this year over in Appleton for awhile? is it completely a non-MLC thing now? Plus, I'm, of course, wondering where the Lord will send me to teach (if anywhere at all). My dog Buck had a seizure on Friday. He seems to be fine now, though. It came just 2 days after his 10th birthday...it's the first one that he's had--at least that we know about. Seizures, from my understanding, are not uncommon in dogs. I know that some do get medicine for them, but with Buck we've got to wait and see if a regular pattern happens (hopefully it'll just be the one) and then try to find out what's causing them. I'm done.
4/30/03 Just got back from speaking at Bethany Lutheran College. I had the pleasure of speaking with a freshmen (mostly) composition class about writing humor/parody/satire and all the challenges/obstacles that go into it. They were a little dead (early morning...one student explained...) but they laughed at my lame jokes, so I liked them. I couldn't fit everything in that I wanted to, but I am going back there next week to talk to a creative writing class for an hour and a half; I think I'll be able to get more in then...I only had 50 minutes today. This is not an insult to that class, but it did remind me of the teaching I did last year in a high school...in fact, that's a compliment; it's nice to be able to just concentrate on the (deep) topic at hand, rather than the babysitting one ends up doing a lot in elementary teaching. I'm especially looking forward to next week's talk because apparently some of those students are seriously interested in starting up a Cabbagesque thing over at Bethany...I know, at least, that some of them have been doing a mock radio news type thing...and I did hear something about an underground paper called "The Toilet Paper"--a delicious pun! I thought that was great when I heard that...plus it seems to be (at least on the micro level that I've observed) somewhat condoned (supported maybe? I don't know) by the faculty there...at least it seems they're not jumping all over it. I think it's wonderful when teachers support non-curricular academic endeavors. Unfortunately sometimes the attitude is something like "those kids are writing on their own...let's get them!" Today is my dog's birthday; he is 10 years old. I remember when I first got Buck...it was the summer before my freshmen year in high school....they grow up so fast. I'll have to call him later. He is getting a little sensitive about his age, though, so maybe I shouldn't draw attention to it. You know how it is when you turn the big one-oh. Well, the "roadmap" for peace has finally been released to all sides involved. It's such a serious debate and I, for one, feel a little guilty about not knowing as much about it as I should, but it does get a little boring at times--as callous as that sounds. But I do think there's got to be something funny about parodying "roadmap" somehow...just a note to myself. I think that's about it for now...my apologies for not updating this for awhile...sort of busy with stuff. I think there might not be an issue next week so that our large, hard-working staff can write a 6-page Intro to Minority Cultures paper. We'll see. I think I'm going to the post office now...I guess the one here in New Ulm closes at 4 or 4:30...I've never heard of that before...I thought all stayed open till 5...I could be wrong, though...because if this bustling metropolis doesn't have a post office open till 5, then I doubt anyplace would.
4/25/03 Another short digression... I've been extremely busy setting up Copper Rock's website. It's a lot of fun (I know I sound like a nerd) and it's pretty cool once you get all the code to work right. I think now I'm one of those snobby geeks who say "Frontpage? Oh, I write my own code; it's so much better." (said with a nasally voice) For the record, I am currently using Frontpage as we speak because that's all I used to know and I've bastardized much of this site with Frontpage code and it's hard to go back and forth...eventually I shall redo this site using straight code, not because I don't like the site Dan designed, but because I'm a loser and if I don't get a teaching call, I'll need something to do with my time. I suppose I could get a job... Anyway, if you're reading this, it probably means that you've checked out the Cabbage guestbook recently. I'm thinking about implementing a policy that if you don't leave a real name or at least a working email address, your comments will be promptly removed. In some cases anonymous comments are appropriate, but when the remarks hold no water, the source is needed to understand the cause of the comments and to clarify what seemingly doesn't make any sense. I don't know; perhaps my anonymous critic could expound so that I can clearly see my "elitist" ways. Maybe I dumped his sister once or something. Oh wait... I know, I know, I've fallen into a typical WELS assumption that anything written with some sort of assertion (baseless as it may be) must have come from a male source. So I should say maybe I dumped her brother once....wait a minute... Well, anyway, I'm grateful for what Ben Wink came out and wrote...I'd almost hate to take off the anonymous stuff because then there'd be no reference to what he said and what he said was well written and very encouraging for me. I won't waste any more energy countering my critic...I'll let Ben do that...he works at the Synod Office Building, so he has loads of time! (insert cheesy smiley face here) I will say that...no, nevermind...back to web-designing.
4/22/03 This shan't be a fully digression; alas, I have too much to do. I am currently learning XHTML and CSS for a few reasons: I want to properly design Copper Rock's new website (I'm their new, cheap, free webmaster). I also think it's a useful tool for teachers, especially in this day and age. And, of course, XHTML and CSS drives the ladies wild! "Hey, baby, God sure made a fine style sheet for you! yeah!" When I have time, I'll make a complete list of CSS pick-up lines. Anyway, when I learn all that stuff, I'm going to try my hand at PHP, which is supposed to be the in-thing now-a-days. Again, I'm doing this to get chicks. My brother Kevin got engaged. I enjoyed reading Ben Wink's rant; I hope others leave rants as well. Don't be shy...I publicly make an ass of myself on here almost daily. Back to my wild HTML book.
4/21/03 Easter break is over. Today I drive back to (New) Ulm. I shall try to digress fully later tonight.
4/15/03 More interesting information that I can't share with you here. Today I played disc golf for the first time. The first round I was something like 16 over; the second round I was 3 under...maybe it was 2 under, now I'm not sure. I've gotten some nice compliments about today's issue...which is nice because I didn't think it was especially good. There will be no issue next week. I may be working on a special full-color issue for sometime down the road...this was in the works for awhile, but I did hear a certain comment today about how The Cabbage is not as good as a certain other publication here on campus because it's only black and white. Not only is this comparing apples and oranges, but it's also absurd considering that I get no money whatsoever for this. So maybe full color will win over a few dissenters. They could go online and read it...it's in color on there. Anyway, more info on all that stuff will most likely surface in the next few weeks. I need to pack tonight for Easter break. I have to decide what CDs to take along, grab some of my friend's DVDs, and make sure I have enough underwear. It was another lovely day here in (New) Ulm...a bit humid, but not bad...plus, some thunderstorms came. My syntax and punctuation are over the place all. I also played a little tennis. After an extended warm-up period, I was up 2-1, but then retired, so Paul won...for the record. Speaking of a Mattek, I want to give a little credit to Professor Mattek for giving me the idea for the "Redistribution of Wealth" article. Another interesting tid-bit about the issue this week...the circled "4"s in the Geology Pick-up Lines were originally some sort of fancy asterisk, but when writing to PDF they changed somehow. I think it's funny because I can imagine somebody either trying to figure out the meaning or claiming that they "get it." I would like to hear it if someone gets it, because I certainly don't. I will be heading home around 3ish tomorrow. I hope to do a little tennising, coffee shopping, movieing, reading, writing, and cleaning up my dog's poop because I didn't do it this last weekend when I was home and my mom probably hates me now. poop. I shall also look into buying some shoes. I really don't have much to say politically or about the war because...well, I just don't right now...I'm sure I will another day soon. I do think, though, that our other Axis of Evil friends are starting to come around...well, at least North Korea. Perhaps Bush will change Iraq to Syria, along with N. Korea and Iran. That is all. I hope you and your loved ones have a lovely, lovely Easter weekend.
4/14/03 The new issue this week will come out tomorrow. Since I want to not worry about it too much over Easter break, there will be no issue next week (April 24th). I went home this last weekend to Appleton. Finally got to see the Copper Rock Coffee shop...great place...you must go if you haven't yet. Also got to see my friend Dave's (and his wife's) new house. Very lovely. Everything is changing on me. I have nothing more I want to say right now.
4/10/03 Regardless of your stance on military force in Iraq, you have to admit it was a beautiful sight to see Iraqis cheering the fall of Saddam's murderous regime. It's reminiscent of the Berlin Wall and the liberation of Kuwait. Another powerful scene was on the local news here (Channel Four out of the Cities): a couple of Iraqi refugees (probably in their 20s) were parading in celebration and were confronting anti-war protestors. One protestor said to one Iraqi that he was happy that Iraq was gaining freedom, but that he was sorry that our government had to kill so many of his fellow civilians. The Iraqi responded with something like, "Freedom always comes at a price; read a history book." Yes, I did cut my nails. I've heard a few comments about the troll thing in one of this week's articles. I'm not going to explain what I was going for, but I am curious if anyone got it. Could be that I'm way off-base and it doesn't make any sense. Last night at supper a lovely young lady...we'll call her Kimberly L. No, K. Lacher...yes, that's better...she came up to me and told me that she had some problems with this week's issue of The Cabbage. I said, "Oh?" She said, "I happen to watch Friends and Dawson's Creek, and I had a younger sibling die of SIDS." For a second or two I felt terrible and was trying to think what to say to her, but then she said she was joking...at least about the SIDS. I thought that was both cruel and humorous. I've started toying around with a new guestbook, since Dan doesn't seem to think it's important, and because I was reminded by a fan that our current one really isn't getting the job done. I think it was basically a temporary one that Michael Wendt took the time to set up for us, but I liked the old one better. This guy in the guestbook has suggested before that a discussion format would be better, but I'm even more clueless as to how to make one of them things. There are some free guestbook services online, but then you have to link to them and they use pop-up ads to make money and everyone in the World Wide Web hates pop-up ads, unless they have a picture of a pretty girl on them. Remember, kids, you can look, but don't click on them. The weather is much nicer here today...66 F. right now. I'm done.
408/03 My fingernails are getting girlishly long; I shall cut them. An interesting day for me. I can't really tell you about it here, but it was certainly interesting. I need to finish editing the new issue. This week's issue includes extensive war coverage, entertainment news, and a list of ways to get back the hour lost to Daylight Saving. And much more!!!
4/07/03 Wow. I'm actually updating daily for once. Apart from a bit of editing and tweaking, the new issue is all set. I've been doing some thinking about the next issue and after consulting with my staff (ha! like anyone would work with me! I don't even like working with me), I've decided to put out a special Easter break issue and then not put one out the week I'm back here at school. I was thinking about not putting out an Easter break issue and then putting one out the week I come back, but I'd rather have a week off from it during break so I don't have to think about it when I'm home. I hope my customers are okay with that. Well, I'm really not in the mood to talk about the war much, even though tons is happening. tons are happening? I do wonder if the Iraqi regime will keep denying that coalition troops are there up until the point you see an Abrams tank pointed at the info minister right on television. You know you're dealing with a fascist-type regime when an Arab country kicks out Al-Jazeera. wow, kansas is within 3...I'm going to go watch that. over and out.
4/06/03 Wow. I'm actually updating daily for once. The new issue is basically finished...that's pretty early for me. I'm starting to work on the next issue already. It's coming out on next Tuesday because we only have class through Wednesday next week (because of Easter break). Since I'm going home this coming weekend I figured I better get a few things written before then. I'm also going to try my hand at making a little links page on here. I think I'll try using Publisher to do that. Okay, I guess that's about it for now.
4/05/03 My apologies for not digressing on here for awhile. Don't worry, though, my offline digressing has been about average. I have been feverishly writing articles for the new issue...should be a good one, if you don't mind me saying so. I lost in the first round of the table tennis tournament here at school. I'm no ping ponging expert, but I was pleasantly surprised to see such a high level of competition. If only our school had a pool table now. Some would say we have two, but I think they're referring to the large replicas of the rolling hills of the Midwest with some holes on the sides. I am munching on some Wheat Thins right now. They have a great taste with a big crunch! How 'bout that Marquette game? Ouch. I wonder if they covered the spread. Copper Rock Coffee is up and percolating. So if you're in the Fox Cities, remember to stop by and spend lots of money so that Seth and Bill can get out of debt, so Seth stops saying "Boy, Mark, I'm in debt." It was my brother's and my dad's birthdays this last week. My dog's birthday is on the 30th. He turns 10...they grow up so fast, don't they? I think the colors of the Final Four court are ugly. It is amazing to me that our country has yet to eliminate the IRS. Billions of dollars in paper, time, and consulting (not to mention increased alcohol sales) are wasted each year due to taxes. A flat tax would eliminate most of it. A national sales tax would be even better. So many people around the world hate America so much right now. Imagine if they had to fill out a 1040...we'd be done for. On Friday The Cabbage got mentioned in the campus nightly news (deliciously punned as the Knightly News, since we are the Knights here). A professor here placed an announcement in the form of an Onionesque (or Cabbagesque?) article. It wasn't terrible. In it he referred to a reporter named Sid Green from The Cabbage. I wonder if the 'Green' refers to the green of a cabbage. Perhaps the 'Sid' is an anagram for 'dis' as in that he disses the Cabbage. I am a dork. Anyway, you know you've made it big when you get mentioned on the campus intranet. In one class on Friday we had a guest speaker named Jay Lo. His butt really wasn't that big. Ah, yes, he was actually a Hmong person involved in out Lutheran ministry in the Twin Cities. Very insightful. I find it interesting that my spell check is not recognizing "Hmong." I especially found interesting what he had to say about feelings toward American involvement in southeast Asia. Very unfortunate some of that crap that happened. My life is actively uneventful.
4/01/03 April Fool's Day. I'm surrounded by them. If anybody wants me to grab him/her a Knight's Page (the MLC literary magazine), there might be a few thousand extra here on campus. I know I should just keep my mouth shut, but the reason I haven't submitted anything to that publication is because one never knows how it's going to come out in the end, with ends of articles cut off and randomly placed graphics and what-not. Oh, well. My five dollars every year has to go for something. I had an interesting thought today. For some reason attractive females tend to be viewed often as unintelligent. Now I don't know if this is true or not; I don't talk to girls. I'm certain that there are many attractive and smart ladies out there, but going along with that perception, I have a few thoughts on the matter. Perhaps the reason hot women may not grow intellectually as voluptuously as they do physically is because of guys who end up talking like third graders when they're near them. "So, you like stuff?" and "So, you like Dawson's Creek?" comes out of our mouths instead of "So, what are your feelings on anti-American sentiment abroad?" or "You ever read any Dostoyevsky?" Therefore, since this is the extent of their intellectual challenge (at least from hormone-crazed men), they actually think they're quite bright because they can answer with ease, "Yeah, I totally like stuff." and "Like, yeah, (insert Dawson's Creek character) is so cool." Just an extended thought. Again, this is based on an assumption that some people make; I can't make that assumption since the only two women I know are my mom and my grandma. The end. I started running yesterday. We'll see how long that lasts. My roommate is a runner so I'm using him as motivation. Chicks dig runners. He is a runner and he's getting married, so this proves my theory. It is now a law: chicks dig runners. I played tennis today and then ran. This makes me a biathlete; I should thus get twice the chicks. This week's Cabbage is pretty much done. We're offering plenty of tax tips and war-related coverage. Tim Clark, third grader, comments on Connie Chung's departure from CNN. Plus much more! All this digressing has speeded my digesting...gotta go! he he he
3/31/03 I have to fill out a self-evaluation form for the student-teaching I did last semester. On one level I can understand why they have us do that, but if you thing about it, a self-evaluation is only valuable insomuch as one values you. If you consider someone to be a complete moron, a self-evaluation only holds water for you if that person says "I'm a complete moron and should never be allowed to be left in a classroom with children." Then you say, "I agree with your assessment." Anything other than that, you say, "This guy is a complete moron and should never be allowed to be left in a classroom with children. He doesn't know what he's talking about." Anyway, we had a Scottish person sign the guestbook. Apparently our site shows up on Scottish search engines; it doesn't seem to show up very well on search engines I've tried. What's the deal with smokers outside clearing their cancer-ridden throats in obnoxiously loud fashion? I am sometimes awoken (awaken?) by this loud and disgusting noise even if my window is closed. I'm no nose and throat specialist, but I don't see the benefits of such a noise. I have noticed that there are some on this campus who do feel the need to make noise at any given time, whether it be load whistling, impromptu dormroom percussion, or unintelligible babbling. Maybe I'm just old and out of touch, but I don't understand their motives...is it arrogance? the desire for acceptance? attention? I don't know. I don't make noise unless it (hopefully) serves a valid purpose. Then again, perhaps if I could carry a tune, I would be one of those annoying singers in the bathroom while people like me are trying to take a dump in peace while somebody is belting out the latest hit by Greenday. I hope that made sense. Copper Rock Coffee is not going to open until Thursday, so if someone traveled down to College Avenue in Appleton for the sole purpose of going there, I apologize. I'm thinking about writing an article exploring the topic of classroom teachers divulging their political viewpoints. If you don't mind, I'm going to throw down a few disorganized thoughts about it right now. No, I'm going to do it anyway. On one hand, I feel that teachers ought not to express their political leanings because teachers--some may debate this point--heavily influence the viewpoints of their students and one doesn't want a bunch of little Republicans or Democrats or whatever it might be because that's what their teacher is (or isn't). On the other hand, I could make the argument that teachers ought to state their political leanings because then students are able to take what their teacher says and the information he/she gives them in the context of any bias that may be there, underlying that information. This goes without saying (although judging from one recent classroom discussion here on the topic, perhaps it doesn't), teachers are certainly obliged to present (present, not express...???) different, valid viewpoints of history and politics (the two are so dependant on each other, aren't they? at least in American history...). Not to toot my own educator-horn, but last year when I taught high school government and history, I felt I accomplished this objective. And I did so by not divulging my political viewpoints; although, perhaps I did so unknowingly. I recall polling several of my students and they for the most part placed me much further left on the political spectrum than I believe I am. So maybe in my quest to be unbiased, I overcompensated for the bias I was aware of? That wouldn't be good either. That's like a father cutting his own son from a baseball team because he was paranoid that he esteemed his own flesh and blood's skills more highly than reality, but in fact, his son should have made the team. Another explanation is that conservative Christian families tend to breed Republican-voters who vote that way based on a litmus test of pro-life viewpoints (which may be a case of the ends justifying the means...depending on how you look at it) and when they are even presented with a liberal viewpoint, they shun it and damn the messenger as one spewing forth leftist propaganda. I'm sure I'm over analyzing this (no, not Mark!) but this is certainly a topic worth exploring. I think I'll write it as a point-counterpoint format, not coming to a definite opinion, which would be honest, because I honestly am not convinced. I do think, though, that at the college level professors ought to give their political views and should be allowed to express them and propagandize to an extent since their students ought to be able to think critically. The problem with this is that U.S. campuses are overwhelmingly sympathetic to liberal causes. What irks me is not when I hear about liberal professors, it's when I hear about liberal professors and campuses that suppress other viewpoints, when, ironically, one worthwhile liberal cause is supposedly the right to free speech (conservative viewpoints are quickly straw-manned (and subsequently muzzled) as racist, hate-filled, war-mongering, and homophobic). I think I just used a parenthetical not within a parenthetical note. In math, I would have had to use brackets I think [is that right? (I really don't know)]. I should really open this thing up with some message board format or something. If you ever want to respond to any of my ramblings or care to express a viewpoint on something I brought up, feel free to email me with it and I'll happily post it on here (unless it's obscenity-laced tirades or something). One topic that has bugged me lately is why are the vast majority of entertainers so far to the left? One idea is that they lead such cushy lives that they lose touch with reality and begin to preach from their pompous, self-glorifying soapboxes, without any regard for practicality and how the real world works. I don't think so; I think most in Hollywood and in the music industry have worked hard (to an extent) for what they've accomplished. I think it's usually a genuine concern for mankind, but a lack of perspective on how to achieve it. Isn't that a nice way of saying what I just disagreed with? I don't know...now I'm talking in circles. I'm listening to Kate Bush...good, relaxing stuff. Haven't been able to get into her early stuff too much, though. Has anyone noticed that TV commercials for "The Pianist" are mispronouncing "pianist"? They say "pee-AHN-ist" instead of "PEE-inist" (forgive my poor pronunciation-type stuff there). Is this so that people don't think of "penis" when they hear the title? Perhaps I'm wrong, but I'm guessing that anyone who would consider going and seeing a holocaust-era movie about a introvert Jewish piano player escaping deportation won't giggle at the proper pronunciation of "pianist." Then again, anyone who would consider seeing a movie made by a fugitive convicted of raping a 12-year-old girl would. As Paul Mattek (he's available, ladies!) alluded to earlier in the evening, we live in a country where Pete Rose can't attend a Major League baseball game because of a little illegal gambling, but most of Hollywood wants to forgive Roman Polanski for drugging and having anal sex with a prepubescent girl. Interesting times we live in. Sorry, in which we live. My life is one big Elimidate. Thanks for playing.
3/28/03 (addendum) I found my I.D. I am now a permanent member of this society.
3/28/03 My life is one big Elimidate.
3/27/03 Copper Rock Coffee should be opening on Monday, March 31st. Those of you in the Fox Cities area, stop on by and enjoy a cup of delicious coffee or try one of the refreshing specialty drinks. Those of you not in the Fox Cities area, drive to the Fox Cities area and then read the previous sentence. When Seth and Bill are millionaires I better get a free cappuccino for giving them free advertising. I mean, 577 losers have visited this sight; granted, 100 are probably from me and 200 are from my mom. I was sitting in the cafeteria today and there were some young ladies were sitting there discussing the latest issue of The Cabbage. My suspicions that nobody here knows who in the world I am are continually being confirmed. I'm guessing most people were disappointed when we were "compelled" to go public. "Who's that guy? I don't know him." "Oh, I was hoping it was..." Anyway, it's Thursday already. My roommate said before, "I can't believe it's Thursday already. Another wasted week." I said, "Come on, you got a lot done this week." He retorted, "I was talking about you." Ouch. I watched Platoon last night; apparently I haven't been getting enough wars lately. Early this week some commentators (including my roommate) started expressing concern over the media's coverage of the war, arguing that since the media tend to focus on the bad stuff happening to our troops rather than the unprecedented military success thus far, people are getting a warped view of how well the war is going. Initially I dismissed this, saying that there are enough media outlets out there that people can easily get a clear picture of how the war is going. Like with anything in the news that can be slanted by a political bias, people just need to be smart enough to see the facts...be able to use critical thinking skills. Well, apparently I overestimated those skills of many Americans. One poll I saw on Friday had 70-some percent of Americans saying that the war is going very well. On Monday, after reports of a few casualties and Iraqi resistance over the weekend, that number dropped down into the 30s. Unbelievable! It's a war! People are going to die. Perhaps a better poll would be to question how this war is going in light of past wars; in your opinion is this war going better than the (insert war here) for the American side? You get the idea. I don't have full cable here so I basically get all my war coverage from the left-leaning CNN and I'm able to tell that the war is going extremely well. I put on a mock news conference before for the entertainment of my roommate... Reporter #1: Were you hoping that you could get through this war without anyone dying? Sec. Rumsfeld: Well, of course, you idiot. You always hope nobody dies. Reporter #2: So are you saying that the war is not going as well as planned? Sec. Rumsfeld: No, you idiots. In war people die and sometimes things don't go exactly as planned, but that's not saying that, overall, things aren't going unprecedently well.
What would the anti-war protesters say if Bush came out and said, "Okay, this war is all about oil"? It's so absurd! If the protestors would say, "I'm against this war because, even though I accept the fact that Saddam is a murdering dictator and has weapons of mass murder in his arsenal, I believe that the risks of war right now outweigh the risks of allowing him to stay in power right now." That's a valid argument; this partisan bullcrap over oil and bloodthirstiness is just ludicrous and invalidates any argument these people may have. Back to the media coverage topic: Some (O'Reilly) have said that the NY Times don't want Bush to come out too clean from this war because that will help him politically in 2004. That's a compelling argument and typically I would go along with it, but I don't know; I think that the media tend to cover the negative in just about anything, whether it be a war or Little League--you don't hear or read about the 1000s of well-run games, instead you hear about the one game where one overzealous (and probably drunk) father attacks some kid umpire. That's the way things are. The status quo is usually not reported; it's when things go haywire that you hear about it. So before I join in on that criticism of some in the press, I want to wait and see the coverage after Iraq is out of Saddam's hands. Although now I do feel that the media has a bigger influence in how people view how the war is going than I did before. I just am not convinced that it's because of any anti-Bush bias. Dan told me that the website archive is now up and running--that's the archive of exclusive internet stuff, not the issues...those have been working for some time now. Time to do some math. Grade school math.
3/25/03 Michael Moore makes it so easy to shoot down his arguments that I find it shameless for commentators to poke fun at him for his weight. Okay, okay, no I don't, but that's only because I can't come up with a fat joke about him right now. But if I did, it would be shameless. I think. The new issue is all set to go, apart from any late-breaking news. I am unveiling the 3rd Annual Proffy Awards. The 2nd annual awards didn't happen last year, but rather than explaining all the math, I figured we'd just pretend that they did. We've got a number of new awards this year and I am certain I won't get expelled for any of them. (I hope.) What scares me about people like Michael Moore is not their viewpoints; in fact, he actually has some thought-provoking things to say every once in a while. What is scary is two things actually: 1. Hypocrisy. I don't remember hearing M.M. complaining when the previous administration bombed a laxative plant in Sudan among other things in other places, the timing of which "blew" in many people's opinions. 2. I hate to say it, but I think some Leftist nuts like M.M. actually want the U.S. to do poorly in the war. I hope I'm wrong, but sometimes extremist political ideologies can warp people so much that, in their minds, it becomes an idealistic platform over pragmatics, personal conviction over the common good. Communism or Nazism ring a proverbial bell? Whatever that all means. Oh well, I'm not going to go back and change it, since this is a rant page. I lost my I.D. card. I can't eat without it. Tomorrow I shall go to the cafeteria and see if anyone turned it in there. Since I'm a major celebrity on campus here, I would think some attractive single female would have brought it to me by now. Shameless plug: go to www.wels.net and read an article written by yours truly. It's the same one for those of you who already read it. I've got to think that "read" must be a difficult word for people learning English; it can be "red" or "reed." That's why we should all go back to using Latin. quid pro quo. in absentia. et tu, Brute? rigor mortis. ad nauseam. pax vobiscum.
3/23/03 (addendum) Daniel Day-Lewis did not win best actor. From this point on the Oscars are completely meaningless. These are the same people who named Gladiator best film. Now I don't want Marty to win; I will look down on him if he wins such a piece of crap award.
3/23/03 Not much to report today. I have written a couple of articles for the new issue...it will certainly be better than last week's. Did a little math earlier, this week's will be the 46th issue. When you think about it, it's all pretty arbitrary; our issues could be twice as big and come out biweekly and then it would be our 23rd issue. Or they could be 92 pages an issue and then this would be our first. Ethan had his harem stop by to help him finish stuffing envelopes for his big wedding extravaganza coming up this June...I thought that was rather kind of them. I should get my own harem, in the strictly non-sexual sense of a harem, of course. The other day I was eating a saf-t-pop and when I got to the end, the two ends came apart and one almost poked me in the eye. I did my taxes yesterday...sure makes the national sales tax idea much more appealing...imagine all those Americans who can't add...or read. I wonder if the troops over there get some sort of automatic extension for filing. When you're going through hell, keep going.
3/21/03 Spring is here, although it's a bit chilly in (New) Ulm today. The war seems to be going as well as one might hope--few casualties and many Iraqi soldiers are giving up. War is hell. When you're going through hell, keep going. I want to apologize for the low quality of the last issue; next week's will be better. I got my remote control...thanks, mom and dad. Even if there weren't any TVs or radios here on campus, you would still know from all the talk and concern around campus about the big basketball tournament. If anyone cares, there is a little article written by yours truly posted at www.wels.net under "America at War." I completely support the war protestors' right to protest, but I wonder if they think of the chance that because of their taking away hundreds of police officers from regular duty, that plots against our citizens could be more easily advanced. I shall go and get some filets-o-fish, being the good Catholic that I am.
3/19/03 New issue is out...could be the worst ever. What does it matter now?
3/18/03 My body has been doing strange things lately. All better now, I hope. Just wrapped up the new issue. For the first time ever I resorted to using a Billy Miller article that was already printed in one of the very first issues. I hope nobody demands his money back. I could have milked the personals section for more space, but I really got bored with it and per my policy of not doing boring stuff I decided to do the unthinkable and recycle humor. Oh well. It's starting to look now that fighting may not start for another week or so. I have been saying that it would start this Friday, but I read a report today of an administration official who stressed that military action would be on Bush's timetable and that when comparable language was used when he authorized action in Afghanistan, it took about two weeks. I'm not sure if this was said just to throw off the timing for the enemy or it actually has some meaning. Of course the media tend to report the sooner than the later so that news nerds like me continuously watch CNN. I prefer the other two, but I don't get them here at school. That Tony Blair sure can speak. I may start wearing suspenders like Larry King.
3/16/03 It is amazing how much time I waste with the Cabbage. I should really spend more time going out with chicks. A curtain of thick fog has enveloped the city of (New) Ulm; I can barely see the parking lot from my first floor window. I'm no meteorologist, but I'm guessing it has to do with all the melting snow vaporizing and meeting the cooler air of the night, which is well below the dew point. That cloud looks like an idiot...oh wait, that's just my roommate walking back from his car. This week we're trying something new with the paper: we're printing a personals section for MLC students. The world news articles are hard to write because I'm not sure what's exactly appropriate given the uncertainty of the times. I have a few things lined up that will be okay I think. I do think it's not as big as a decision after 9-11 because we're prepared for war; we know it's most likely going to happen. With 9-11 it was such a huge shock that nobody knew if humor was appropriate at the time...and for how long? So right now I'm planning on not avoiding the Iraq situation. In a way, I feel it's better to write about it because it at least draws attention to it for a campus that unfortunately tends to be uninvolved with the affairs outside itself. This is a generality of course. The media are making it sound like Monday or Tuesday will be the start of bombing, but I'm thinking it won't be until late in the week, perhaps not until the weekend. I am sure that we are about prepared militarily speaking, but the German embassy for whatever reason still is open and I think it would look bad for Bush II to kill some Krauts...Chinese were okay. You've got to wonder about the whole Turkey situation, too...last I checked it seems we have a bunch of troops and equipment sort of in limbo. Turkey's got to be kicking themselves. I mean, they gave up $15 billion! And their economy is far worse than ours. Now the Frogs come out and say they'll compromise and agree to a 30-day time period of delay. The problem with that is the rest of the resolution would be the same language as 1441 and then they'll argue at the end of the 30 days that Iraq is complying and that we need to give them more time. Without giving away my viewpoint on whether or not war is appropriate in this case, I do think that it will happen and that the longer we wait, the more lives will be lost. I think that more lives will be lost when the fighting starts that would have been lost had the fighting started weeks or even months ago. The temperatures are rising in Iraq; this will lead to general heat-related complications such as quicker fatigue, mechanical problems, and dehydration. It also may pose a huge problem if the use of biochemical equipment and suits are needed, since they are so heavy and provide little ventilation. I saw Blair today comment on the Middle East situation with Israel and Palestine and, although I believed it be of genuine concern, it just seemed like a pathetic attempt to convince people that somehow peace will tumble down like dominoes from a liberated Iraq throughout the region. I don't think that will happen; I don't think it will hurt, but I'm not convinced it will help. I think I wrote on this once (below somewhere) when Bush made the same claims awhile back. I downloaded my TV instruction manual off the internet and got the codes so I could program my remote so I can operate the DVD player now since I left it at home. I talked to my mom and she said she was sending it on Monday or my Dad, I don't remember which. But I would still like the DVD remote so I can change subtitles and audio settings, which I can't do right now. Brett's going home this coming weekend. Okay, I'm going to go start reading The Hunt for the Red October...I've never read any Clancy before if you can believe that. Just remember: A man has to know his limitations, but he also has to know the limitations of those around him.
3/15/03 Beware the ides of March!
3/14/03 Friday, or as we say
in (New) Ulm, "Freitag!" I have been listening to The Police in
recognition of their abduction into the Rock and/or Roll Hall of Fame.
Only the poetic genius that is Sting could come up with the line: "We
have to shout above the din of our Rice Crispies/We can't hear anything at
all" and "And every single meeting with his so called superior/Is a
humiliating kick in the crotch." Actually, I do like a lot of their
earlier stuff. I'm unfamiliar with most of the album titles because I have
that "Message in a Box" boxed set with all their recordings on 4
discs. Early on they were like a punk band with good musicians. Andy
Summers has a few decent jazz albums out, too. Is it Summers or Sumners?
I don't remember. It's pretty warm out today. My roommate spotted
somebody wearing an anachronistically hilarious "I write The Cabbage"
t-shirt. Anachronistically hilarious, because at the time they were
printed, we were anonymous. I got half a point off my math quiz because I
was lazy and copied a list of formulae off the internet and a formula was
wrong. What kind of world is it when one can't trust what he finds on its
wide web? But it's my destiny to be the king of pain. I had 6
classes this week. In the past I've had semesters when I've had 6 classes
in one day. If I could swing it, I'd have those 6 classes in one day and
then have 6 days off. I wish premeditated skips would coincide with days
the professor skips. My roommate almost hit me in the head with an ice
skate...two fell from the shelf he was monkeying with...I waited for a third,
because I thought that would be funny, but only two fell. I almost had a
splitting headache--ha ha ha! I'll be wrapped around your finger. I
have been living for almost a week without my DVD player remote control; I can
only watch certain movies because there is no way to navigate through menus
without a remote. And you'll be wrapped around my finger. Mom, if
you read this, please send me my remote. To test the intelligence of this
place, I once walked around with two dead batteries and asked people, "I'll
trade you these for two of your batteries." Nobody went for it.
And it's murder by numbers, one two three, it's as easy to learn as your
ABCs. I went to Martin Sponholz's "aulic" the other
night...great stuff. He went to Antarctica and was smart and stuff...very
funny guy. Tonight I shall check out the Boo Brodie show here on campus
and then go over and play at my friend's house.
3/12/03 The new issue is online. For some reason it ain't working right, but I think you can get it if you wait for it awhile. I'm giving chapel here at MLC tomorrow night. I have a jacket here to wear, but the shirt that goes with it is at home, so I'm not wearing a jacket. I hope nobody is distracted by that. I also nobody minds that I wrote "farts" in the new issue. I had one class today. It's nice having so few classes because that gives me the opportunity to focus hard and do exceptionally well.
3/11/03 It's Tuesday. The new issue (VI.7) is basically done; I only need to proofread again and tweak the layout a bit. It was a bit warmer here today...near 40, I think. My body thinks there's something in the water here. This week's issue features a prototype of our logo that I came across looking through our old files. I'm not planning on changing to it, but I thought it would be fun to try it. Let me know what you think. The issue also features both the Mr. Trite Conversation Starter of the Week (clever ideas to break the ice and make that great first impression) AND the Mr. Current Events Joke of the Week (clever and timely one-liners to show that special someone you're both humorous and up-to-date with world news). We also have rejected cafeteria slogans and a list of what people are giving up for Lent, along with the normal award-winning news reporting.
3/10/03 Back in (New) Ulm. A big thank-you to Mrs. Shilling in MLC Network Services for getting me back online.
3/08/03 One more night here, then it's back to (New) Ulm. Not much going on here...I just wish this snow storm would have hit tomorrow morning so I could stay here another day. I have to pack stuff up and get ready to leave tomorrow. It's amazing how fast two weeks can go. For those of you who care, the new issue of The Cabbage will be out on Wednesday (Thursday, officially). I was hoping to write a bunch of stuff over break, but oh well...mediocrity has never stopped issues in the past.
3/05/03 This vacation is going way too fast. I'm sure you've all noticed how one of the news networks is now referring to "suicide bombers" as "homicide bombers." I understand that the purpose is to avoid glorifying the murderer by focusing on the loss of others' lives, not his/her own. But I think there is a slight semantic problem with the term; a "homicide bomber" could be someone who may or may not take his own life in the process of the bombing. I enjoy watching that network but a little thing like that could cause one to question their journalistic integrity. Now I'm not talking about news commentators; I'm talking about anchors and reporters whose job is to present the news in a non-political, non-biased manner no matter how morally obvious a judgment like that is. Even the 9-11 ordeal--I didn't need Linda Vester trying to communicate to me with her overly dramatic pregnant (excuse the pun) pauses for breaths and big bug eyes just how tragic and sad the attacks were; I and any other American (save for a few on the Left who quickly condoned the attack on our racist, sexist, murdering nation--compared to what other nation, I'm not sure) were able to figure out by ourselves how terrible it was. I didn't need an anchor to tell me. The other morning my mom woke me up at 7:30 and told me that she was going to work and Buck was outside. Buck is my Siberian Husky. Like I normally would do in that situation, I mumbled a few unintelligible words and fell back asleep, assuming Buck would knock on the back door or let out a small bark to wake me. I woke up around 11:30, four hours later. I thought it was weird that Buck didn't wake me up, so I went to the back door to see if he was still out there or if Brett or someone let him in. I saw his chain but he wasn't connected to it. I ran around the house calling him; he wasn't in the house. You see, Buck doesn't get the whole concept of boundaries and roads and cars that can run over dogs, so I was a bit concerned. I ran back downstairs and started putting some pants on when I looked at the back door and there was Buck waiting with a four foot segment of cable-style chain attached to his collar. Not wanting him to dart away playfully (he does that sometime), I slowly went to the backdoor and opened it and calmly invited him in. He trotted in all happy and went to his water dish and had a nice long drink. I examined him and didn't find any injuries. Who knows how long he was gone? I was pretty happy he was back safe and not dead. He slept all day, so I'm guessing he had quite an adventure. He came back so that helped my self esteem a bit. He's almost 10. That really puts things into perspective. My dad works with a guy who's on a local used car dealership commercial; we all have our claim to fame. Hey, Kevin, if you read this, give me a call...I was thinking you could come up here and we could do something with Seth and others. I'm sure you've all had many a conversation debating which woman in the Bible was the best-looking. I just had that conversation again tonight. Now most guys would quickly go with Bathsheba, but I've got to go with Esther. King Xerxes had his pick from all those women and he chose her. Other choices by people not me include Mary Magdalene, Ruth (I don't think she was all that), and that one prostitute in the Old Testament. Please don't hate me.
3/02/03 February is such a rip off: only 28 days. It got really cold out today. I went walking with Buck last night around 10 or 11 and it was pretty nice; today I went during the daylight and it was freezing out. Not much to update...I really got to start writing some more stuff this week. I went and saw Gangs of New York for the fourth time. Now I think I might sit down and watch some X-Files, season six. bye
2/28/03 So we go to this establishment in Darboy last night. It was called the Silver Spur Saloon or something like that. Anyway, apparently some waitress at one of the newer eateries in Appleton wanted one of my fellow patrons to meet her there. We park and get out, realizing that ours was the only vehicle that was not a truck and that had no '3' sticker on it. We did not go in. I'm not sure if those number 3 stickers are some sort of sporting thing or if it's some sort of new Trinity fanclub. The rest of the evening was fun, but as far as the conversation with other people in the varied establishments, I'll just say I have to find some ugly friends to hang out with. Take that however you will; I'm not even sure how to take it. It's a nice day today---put near 50, I think. I'm going down to my brother's today--the one with the big head. I'm going to see a friend whom I haven't seen in quite some time, although he occasionally finds time in his busy life of the ministry to communicate with me electronically. Mr. Rogers died yesterday--that really puts it into perspective, doesn't it? I watched him a lot when he was alive; I remember getting upset with my mom because she would watch soap operas instead of Mr. Rogers. I would always say, "Mom, those shows glorify promiscuous sex and greatly misrepresent traditional American values." I did like that pirate guy with the patch, though. I just ate my last marshmallow. My dog needs me.
2/26/03 I wonder if I should change the name from "Daily Digressions" (which it really is; Dan got the name wrong above) to something else, because I've already missed a few days' entries. Few things upset me more than waiting behind a car that is having a standoff with another car at a four-way-stop. I mean, how hard is it? The car that stops at the intersection first goes first. If it's a tie, the car on the right gets to go. Worse than that situation is when I clearly get there after another car and that person waits for me. With my luck, I'll go and then he'll hit me and it'll be my fault because he had the right of way. Idiots. I for one am starting to roll through four-way-stops just to avoid the whole thing. I think we should have four-way-yields. The other driving atrocity is when people who are turning left at a controlled intersection are about three feet from the curb. Not only does this make it so that car has to turn its wheels in so if it gets hit from behind it goes right into oncoming traffic, it makes it impossible for me turning left in front of him to see oncoming traffic. Hug the stupid curb so both drivers can see! Today I saw a guy actually maneuver his vehicle away from the curb as he approached the intersection. Idiot. I personally think that if they would paint turning lanes narrower the problem would be cut in half. I think half the idiots, like the guy I just mentioned, think that you need to turn a little to the right before you turn left and a little to the left if you're turning right, as if the curb is going to jump out and try to grab you or something...I don't know. The other half sees the painted line and the curb and thinks he has to stay right in the middle. The other half are just random idiots committing random acts of stupidity. I'm not sure about my subject/verb agreement in this entry. I think it's sad that more people tuned in for that American Idle crap than did for the president's speech. I was surprised that Bush seemed to claim that by removing Saddam (what is 'Saddam' backwards with an extra 's' in there?) it would somehow lead to peace between Israel and Palestine. I guess I don't see that happening...perhaps some of the terrorists' funding would be cut off from Iraq. Maybe Bush wants to divvy up the oilfields with Israel and Palestine and then they'll both be happy. That last sentence was tongue-in-cheek; I don't believe this "war" is about oil, I want to make that clear. If I ever start a rock and roll band, I'm going to name it "Hans Blix." I'm going to start a reality show that takes place in Tibet. It will involve a conservatively-clad woman, who seemingly has renounced all wealth and is living a simple life of poverty and that is free of temptation. She will meditate with a bunch of Tibetan monks and then choose one to be her husband. She will then admit that she is actually a millionaire swimsuit supermodel who gets around town, and see if the monk still wants her. The show's called "Jane Karma" or something. Okay, I'm sorry, that wasn't funny. Plus, I don't think Monks date much anyway. Do you think Buddhist monks (assuming they don't marry; I'm not sure if that's the case or not) have the same problems with homosexuality as Catholic priests? When I was a child (okay, last year) I always got confused as to who the Dalai Lama was. I always pictured some dressed up llama. That joke works better on paper; I suggest you don't use it in conversation, because 'Lama' and 'llama' are homophones (at least in English...at least the way I pronounce them). When I was I child I always got confused as to what a homophone was. I always pictured...oh, never mind.
2/24/03 If John Ring is reading this, I'll get that article to you tomorrow (hopefully). I helped out a little bit at the Copper Rock Coffee Company that should be open in about five weeks.* The shop is really starting to come around; I'm disappointed that I'll be heading back to school just a couple of weeks before it opens. For those of you who don't know about it, it's a new coffee shop that's opening up on College Ave. in Appleton, WI. I've never actually had their coffee or sandwiches yet, but I can assure you (as a small anonymous MLC celebrity), that Copper Rock Coffee is the best coffee shop/deli in the city. Back to that original thought...I am writing a serious type religious article for an MLC WELSian publication (not The Knight's Page); I was hoping to be done by now, but I'm not. By the way, I happened to mention to my parents that the December issue of The Knight's Page (MLC's student newspaper/magazine/free for all) just came out two weeks ago, and my dad says, "Why did they release it so early?" Leave it to my dad to come up with that joke. I scraped lead paint off ceiling tiles today. My plan is to chip in a little free labor now while Seth and Bill are broke and then wait 10 years until they're millionaires, then I'll sue their assets off. I mentioned the other day that I'll have to find a better picture for above, but then I noticed Dan made me wink at you on the link on the homepage. I'm guessing he spent hours working on that little effect, so maybe we'll keep the picture. I like coffee ice cream. I think I'm going to add a movie and music section so I can let you know what's good. Tony Levin and Peter Gabriel did not win a Grammy--more proof that the Grammys are really not awards at all. If D. D.-Lewis doesn't win an Oscar this year, then those are almost at the Grammy level...especially after Gladiator won Best Picture. I should go hit the bars.
*five weeks = the three weeks Seth says it will take + the two weeks I always add on (since November)
2/23/03 Wow! The new site looks pretty good now. I have my own page here. I should really look into changing that picture; that's my freshmen picture from MLC, which was taken in 1997. I am now much more virile-looking. The guestbook looks a little different than the last one, but it works well. Perhaps I should put in my own guestbook? I guess that's all I have today.
2/22/03 Who needs terrorists? We're killing ourselves just fine. I wake up the other morning to huge balls of fire on Staten Island on the CNN and then the night club disaster in Rhode Island. I'm sure the terrorists are just sitting back enjoying themselves. Hair bands. Anyway, we're still working on revamping the site a little bit. I had a pleasant drive home. Three people's laundry, a computer, monitor, DVD player, and two cases of beer sure increases the old car's stopping distance. I should do some laundry.
2/20/03 I will be shutting this down later tonight so I can pack up my computer; I'm taking it home for midterm break, which is two weeks long. The site will look much better soon as Dan tries to fix some of the stuff I messed up. He will soon be setting up a Random Thoughts section for me separate from The Cabbage. I think it will be called "Mark D.'s Daily Digressions" or something like that. I had an interesting phone call last night--it was someone complaining that the Presidents' Day pickup lines in VI.6 weren't working for her. I explained to her that it's probably because P. Day was on Monday, so I apologize to anyone else who ran into the same problem. I was going to go down the hill and responsibly enjoy some Schell's Bock in moderation, but, alas, no one is around! I just read that King Crimson is touring the states, but the closest show is Milwaukee (and I'll be in New Ulm at that time)...plus the show is on a Sunday. There are 2 shows in Chicago on that Friday and Saturday, but I don't know if driving that far to see KC sans Levin and Bruford is worth it. I mean, they're still great, but I don't know. If anyone cares, you can find the tour dates at www.king-crimson.com. I also read that it looks like Kate Bush may be releasing a new album sometime soon...can you believe it's been a decade since her last? I'm old. Check back often; I'll keep updating over break.
2/19/03 So I'm watching the CNN the other day and I see an anti-war protest going on in Seattle. Where in Seattle? That's right, on a bridge during rush-hour traffic--shutting down the whole side of the bridge. Now no matter what your political views are on the use of military force in Iraq (notice, I didn't say "war in Iraq" because there ain't no war yet, last time I checked), you have to admit this is a pretty dumb way to go about promoting your cause. If they tried that crap in NYC, they would actually cause a war. The new issue will be on here later today.
2/18/03 The new issue is finished except for some proofreading and last minute breaking news to be added. Someone on the guestbook (on the old site) asked if it's possible to access old Random Thoughts. No, because I just started this a few days ago. But I am glad someone cares about my ramblings. I was sitting in a class today (one of two--these two a days are killing me!) and with five minutes left, people began packing up their stuff and buttoning their coats. Now I like the people who sit around me in class; they are intelligent and good people, who will make great teachers... But today we had a guest speaker. I don't like it when it's (just) the professor who is being disrespected like that, but to have someone come from miles away to have people pack up with five minutes left is especially not good. There's just no need for it; we have plenty of time in between classes and it only takes a few seconds to put your book in a book bag and button up your jacket. I know this sounds like a petty thing, (and it probably is) but I feel strongly about it. On a positive note, at my first class today, the professor was absent, but the class all stayed and went ahead with group presentations with good cooperation from everyone (well, except me). Either they're a respectful, intrinsically-motivated bunch or we didn't have the balls to leave, fearing it was the old hidden camera trick. (or an nose-kisser like me would rat everyone out) We grageeating seniors at MLC have our 100 days party tonight. Hope to see you there. bye btw, still working on getting rid of that green hole in the middle of the site. If anyone is interested in The Cabbage mouse pads, let us know at info@thecabbage.com. We don't have any made, but it's something we could do...they would probably be around $10 a piece.
2/22/03 Who needs terrorists? We're killing ourselves just fine. I wake up the other morning to huge balls of fire on Staten Island on the CNN and then the night club disaster in Rhode Island. I'm sure the terrorists are just sitting back enjoying yourselves. Hair bands. Anyway, we're still working on revamping the site a little bit. I had a pleasant drive home. Three people's laundry, a computer, monitor, DVD player, and two cases of beer sure increases the old car's stopping distance. I should do some laundry.
2/17/03 I was sitting in the cafeteria this evening and I saw what I thought was a Godfather t-shirt (as in the Puzo novel and Coppola movie), but it turned out to be the latest Cos shirt. Yes, The Cosfather. On one hand I could compliment the Cos organizers good taste. But then my other hand slaps me in the face and yells "What are you thinking?" I just think it's interesting that 90% of people wearing the shirts probably haven't seen the movie. There's nothing completely wrong with that, but I feel that if you're going to spoof something, you should at least know what you're spoofing. Man, have I been a little bitter lately! I should be more positive. I've received some comments about sounding bitter towards MLC and readers here, but I'm not. I'm honestly surprised that The Cabbage got as big as it has here, but I think we've reached our limit and would like to try to reach more readers by covering non-MLC inside joke stuff. Don't worry, though, there's still some stuff here to have fun with before the end of the year. I'm thinking about starting an a cappella hand bell choir. Anyone interested?
2/14/03 It's Valentine's Day. Yippy. Look for new stuff on the website; it's snowing and I can't go to Mankato now. I added a Survivor II update.
losers.